I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
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