so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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