Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
