So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Randomize
