Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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