Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
