Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize