Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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