I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Randomize
