So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize