Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
