we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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