you traded sex for a burrito?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Randomize
