Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Hippo gnu deer
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
