that's an acceptable place to lick
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize