i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
