He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
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