When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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