and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
