your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
