Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Randomize
