i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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