I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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