i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
