I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
don't judge my taste in strippers
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Randomize