Nicole vs. Life
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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