yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
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