and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
