You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
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