you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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