do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
