I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
