Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
soo... how was my night?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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