Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
