The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Randomize
