Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
