At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I think i got beer on your cat.
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