Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize