alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I touched a dick in church today
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
