I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Randomize
