We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Randomize
