Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
