it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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