I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
