Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
