Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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