I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
