Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
