super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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