Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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