Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
