I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Randomize
