Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
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